Developing Yourself

Personal development is … personal.   It varies for each individual and comes in a wide variety of activities.  It has been my experience that you have to actively want to change yourself before anything can be done. Without the drive or mindset to change, you can’t change.  You have to really want to improve. Once you have decided to change, you are able to grow and learn from your experiences. Personal development will aid in all aspects of your life, from the home to the work place.

The ability to reflect on the characteristic or behavior you want to change is often difficult.  It’s hard for most people to change, even when they want to.  It takes effort.  It me took me years to figure out that there were things about my character that I wanted to change and even longer to actually make the change a set reality. Often times, the need for change comes from a dark part of your life, but maybe you are fortunate to have insight or a great friend or mentor helping you navigate through the process of change.

The path to personal development can be long and difficult at times.  Change is hard work, but that isn’t to say you won’t have fun in the process. If you enjoy reading, there are thousands of books on many different development topics that you want to learn about.  You may not realize it, but the books personnel or human resources (HR) speaks about to staff most often have great truths hidden within them, as long as you are willing to accept the advice.

It has been an ongoing process for me to develop, both personally and professionally. In fact, I work at it every day.  I’ve taken classes, read books, worked with a life coach, and exercise classes. Learning about yourself, to include your short comings, isn’t easy.  Trust me I certainly didn’t like some of the things I knew I needed to improve.  I was in denial for many years, because 1) it was effort to change, 2) what if I didn’t like the new me, and 3) what would I be giving up?  Believe it or not, some changes in your characteristics for the better may create conflict with those in your life keeping you in the old behavior pattern you are trying to improve or no longer have.

I have found that if you don’t continuously improve your mindset or look for the positives in your life, you stagnate and get stuck in a rut; a nice mediocre, barely living rut. This happened to me as well, for many years I allowed life to happen. I just went with the flow. But, I found the key is to always reflect on yourself whenever things are going well or not. This combination of reflection gives you a solid look into what happens in your life, and more importantly, it shows how you react or what you need to do to make a course correction.

If you’re having a hard time tapping into your emotions, and don’t have the insurance for a therapist, finding a nonjudgmental friend, mentor, or life coach might be good for you. You two can speak about what problems you are having. The benefit of a trained person is their ability to help you strike a balance of give and take before pursuing an option, whereas a friend may be too emotionally involved.

With the right mindset, humans are able to move mountains. If you want to change for the better, you will. Don’t be discouraged, keep working at it, and allow yourself to enjoy a better life.

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